Author Archive: The Oisvorfer

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Vayeshev 2017: The Sexual Abuse of Yoisef (Joseph)

Raboyseyee and Ladies: The Sexual Abuse of Yoisef (Joseph):   This week the Oisvorfer begins by bringing sexual abuse charges against a well known Toirah personality. You read it here first. Though the acts perpetrated date back some 3500 years, efsher more, yearly when we read this chapter of the heylige Toirah, we become angry […]

Vayishlach 2017: Sexual Misconduct Then and Now

Raboyseyee and Ladies: Sexual Misconduct Then and Now Long before charges of sexual impropriety hit Hollywood, Washington and the Media, we read about such zachin in the heylige Toirah. We did? Say it’s not so please, but it is. Back in Bereishis we learned that the cunning snake sidled up to Chava and convinced her […]

Vayeytzei 2017: The Perils of Working for One’s Father-in-Law & Animal Foreplay

We begin with happy news: Big mazel tov wishes to friends and cousins Suzanne and Barry Rozenberg, and to Lynn and Joel Mael, upon the birth of a baby boy, born to their children Fani and Jonathan Mael. Welcome to the world baby Mael. The bris will take place IM’H tomorrow morning; all are invited. […]

Toldois 2017

We begin with a late breaking mazel tov! Just got word that Marissa Levitan, beautiful daughter of our friends Bends and Larry Levitan, got engaged just last night to Doron Moskowitz. Details to follow. Raboyseyee and Ladies: Blindness: Nine Different Ways We begin with a shameless plug for a chaver who happens to be a […]

Chaya Soro 2017

Raboyseyee and Ladies: The Killing Angel & Avrohom: The First Ever Re-Gifter?   Shoin, as our parsha of the week opens, we learn that Soro Emanu (our foremother) had recently passed and that her dedicated and subservient husband -under directions of the RBSO who told Avrohom in very specific language “Koil Asher Toimar Eylecho Soro, […]

Vayero 2017 – Tongues With Mustard

This week we begin with a big, givladige, and heartfelt mazel tov to our friends, formerly of Lawrence, now firmly planted and established over in Ramat Beit Shemesh, Shuly and Ronnie Baruch, upon the engagement of their beautiful daughter Ayelet (she an Oisvorfer follower, good for her!) to Elkana Meitliss, the son of Ofra and […]

Lech Lecha 2017: Oig the Giant, Mi’cho’ale the Angel & Eliezer the Slave

Raboyseyee and Ladies:   Oig the Giant, Mi’cho’ale the Angel & Eliezer the Slave   In this, our eighth review of parshas Lech Lecha, we will not again be delving into Avrom’s adventures with his wife Sorai, nor how she ended up -twice- in the King’s Palace (two different kings), and boudoir. We have previously […]

Noiach 2017: Too Bad To Kill Them All?

An exciting week in town. A number of mazel tovs shout-outs among our friends and neighbors; givaldig mamish and here we go. Mazel Tov to our friends Lynn and Joel Mael upon the engagement of their beautiful daughter Daniella to Dovie Drelich, the son of Debbie and Moish Drelich. Details to come. Mazel tov to […]

Hoishana Rabba / Simchas Toirah & Parshas Bereishis 2017

Extended Combo Edition Spanx  &  In the Beginning Raboyseyee and Ladies: Shoin, brace yourselves for another three day Yom Tov, six more meals and a few le’chaims. Ober how will the baseball fans know how just how the Yankees are faring while they’re in shul davening or perhaps even dancing a few short hakofos around […]

Succois 2017

Raboyseyee and Ladies: Exhale!  With the blessings of the RBSO, we’re all still here. Seemingly we’ve been spared; at least for now. Don’t take that as a license to go out and start a brand new slate of avayrois; the RBSO is zicher watching and has you on a short leash. This week, just as […]